my love is building a building around you

I went to get my tea leaves ready today. i almost kind of freaked out and fainted except i didn't. my hands g ot all tingley and hot and my neck got tingley and then my lips and i was like fuck i'm going to panic stop panicking you loser you're getting your TEA LEAVES read!!! so i calmed down a bit. sometimes i think that stuff like that is nonsense but also she said a lot of things that were pretty acurate that i was like woah, IT'S TRUE!! also i went with my friend jilian and she was way more acurate with her and it was fucking wierd and scary and i'm a fucking tea leaf believer
it would be funny if the song day dream believer was actually tea leaf believer. actually, i just looked up the lyrics and it wouldn't make any sense so whatever..
she said that i had a lot of tears in my cup and i was like HEY!! I cry all the time!!! but she was saying like in the positive side of my cup i had two tears that kind of surround everything and so i kind of think she might mean happy tears? i'm not sure. cause i do cry all the time but not always sad tears cause wierd things make me cry happy tears but ugh i don't even know how to explain what i feel sometimes. for example, last weekend, my whole family was together and i was really excited cause it's been a while since we were all together and i just was on the virge of bawling the whole time and my brother plays the bagpipes and most people hate that instrument, but bagpipes make me fucking bawl because it's like a symbol of my family or something because most of the boys and men in my moms family played the bagpipes and most of the girls highland danced and so we're all like scottish and whatever and when my brother plays the bagpipes i have to go hide my face in the bathroom cause i can't not cry. and also he brought his new girlfriend home for the weekend and she's really nice and smart and i'm so proud of my family cause they are all so smart and awesome and i think i also cry when i am around them because i think i am the f ailure of the family and that makes me sad, even though i am incredibly happy that i have such smart and awesome siblings. god i'm fucking crying. also, my aunt was home and she asked me how i liked seeing willie nelson and i told her that i cried at that cause he is such a legend and it was this like historical moment for me or something and of course, i started crying when i was talking to her about it, right in front of my brothers and jonny's super smart fucking awesome girlfriend that i just met 5 minutes before.
she also warned me not to have babies right now cause it's NOT the right time. I'm with her on that one. she was kind of trying to figure out my living arrangement and she's like well, you don't live in an apartment really... or a house... and she was kind of like umm... a double house??? and i live in a duplex so that was cool. and she said that i don't want to live there and neither does troy and we won't live here long and the reason we live here is because we are too scared to 'take the plunge' and buy a house even though my feeling towards it is just fucking do it and if it doesn't work out, then so what.. start over... which is totally acurate cause my feeling about bills is that i'm always going to have them no matter what so whatever, if i buy a house and i can't afford the bills, i can just sell it and whatever not worry cause everything will be fine and she was like you're right... everything WILL be fine. and she said i am simple and i like simple things and i don't want any kind of super compllicated life and i just want to live calmly and quietly. she kept saying that i am planning a wedding, which i'm not but she's like no, i'm sure of it. you are. ??? ok... if you say so. and she said that there are a lot of people in my life that are really just useless to me and i don't want them around me and i don't want to talk to them but they're always there, and that they are a nuissance in my life. true. she said a lot of other things that i don't really feel like talking about but were acurate i guess. she said that the letters c, r and w were probably important in my life- like people who's names start with those letters.

may my heart always be open to little birds

get ready guys. here are some pictures.

here is the front


and back of my brother's hair-do.


Here is a chair that just rests atop a fence post on the way to the beach.


Here is a part of a church



and here is my boyfriend and some other people a few months ago.


Now for me. You guys are in store for a treat and a half.
this is me being pretty angry about having my own computer/sewing/craft room. I am actually quite happy about it, but whatever. i look mad.


And here are some pictures I took of myself last winter. I am so hot.





The doctor has since given me acne medicine. I didn't think it was working then i noticed those pictures and i'm now convinced that they work. oh my god those pictures make me laugh because they are so ugly. i don't really look like that. i swear. really.
i had a bunch of things to say and now that i'm actually typing i don't remember.
this kid rode his bike into out driveway and was like hi. you guys have been in the garage ALL day. i said actually no, we just got here. and he's like um you are going to stay here all night and sleep in the garage. if you do, i am going to shoot you with my gun. actually i don't really have a gun. well, i do have a water gun. but i won't squirt you. oh but if you stay in the garage, i will go get my water gun and squirt you. and i have a super soaker. and it squirts far. *meanwhile, troy starts spraying a cooler with the hose and i warn the kid that troy is going to spray him with the hose* and he starts saying ya wanna piece of me?? hun? ya wanna piece of me?? are ya gonna squirt me? except instead of squirt, he was saying something like skwiette cause he couldn't really talk. fuckin kids, eh
another kid creepily talked to me the other day. i was coming out of the store and getting in my car and up drives this little fattish girl on her bike, and might i add tht she had a horrible mullett, and she was like hi. how are you? all adult like but she was like 9. good, i say, and you? good. just goin' to the store ha ha... oh yeah... i say. well, anyways, I'll see ya after! she says. k. i say.
i am readin James and the giant peach. i wish a little man would come and give me magic things to eat to make my life magical. i wouldn't trip and drop them and let them fall into the ground.

being a nurse puts coins in the purse

i am seriously considering going back to school to become a nurse. if there is anyone that is a nurse that reads my blog, tell me if you like or dislike your job and what are the positives and negatives?

also i watched a movie called The Wool Cap with William H macy in it and he's a mute and it's fucking good and i bawled my eyes out. he's the superintendent of an apartment building in detroit and he doesn't talk and he wears this wool hat most of the time.

The Pacific's Terrific, The Atlantic's Romantic

For those of you who don't know, I work at a call center. It seems that lately, people feel the need to call me and tell me their life stories. The other day, this brittish guy calls. He lives in Toronto. He serirously talked to an hour, and I kept trying to interrupt him to say ok... gotta go, but he wouldn't let me. He was around 60 he said, and his mom died recently and she was buried the next day (because Jewish people bury their dead the day after they die) so he didn't get to make to to england for the funeral so he hasn't had closure so he wants a phone that can work in england cause he's going to go soon so he can have closure. He had a hernia operation recently. he's on disability. he goes to the pub for brunch with his buddies every day. there were winds gusting to over 100 kms an hour the morning that he called. also he lives in the safest neighborhood in toronto cause the police are always patroling. and was picked up by two girls at the pub the other night and they took him home and made him food, and too bad he didn't have a camera phone at the time, cause he would have liked to have taken some shots of them cause they were real cute. He called me his sweety a million times. it's funny what accents can do. cause seriously, if some canadian creep calls me sweety a million times, i'd get pretty annoyed, but my friend david didn't annoy me.


THEN, this lady calls and talks to me for an hour. she has been on 4 cruises. and she saw paul mcartny and she says the song Mall of Kintyre is the best song ever cause it has bagpipes. i told her my brother plays the bagpipes and she got all excited. then i told her i used to highland dance and that my aunt was a world champion dancer. she got way more excited. then she said "Jill? DO you believe in independence?" And I said, "Well.... yeah." and she said, "Jill? Do you have your own car?" and I said "yes." And she said, "THAT'S THE WAY TO GO-GO!!! YOU'RE A SMART GIRL!!!!" She said "That's the way to go-go" about a million times during the phone call. Then she said that the first car she bought was a bright yellow parisienne convertable in the '60's. Her boss asked her why she bought a silly thing like a convertible and she said "Cause when I go to the drive-in to watch movies, i don't want an OCTOPUS ALL OVER ME!!!! HAHAHAHAHA" She did a lot of amazing things, so after everything she said, i said, "Wow." and then she kept making fun of me for only being able to say wow and she'd start laughing and yelling "Wow!! Double wow!! hahahaha" when i told her that i was from pei, she said the atlantic's romantic and laughed a lot and then said the pacific's terrific. she also just out of nowhere said"Once, when i was in Toronto, I met a girl from Nova Scotia and her name was Beverly Pickle and she likes sardines!! Isn't that FUNNY?!?!?!" God. wierd. Oh, also, my brittish friend told me that God likes love, not worship. Those have been my two favorite callers ever I think.

there is a little girl that lives accross the street from me, and this morning, when i was opening up my blinds, I noticed that she was sitting in a tire rut on the side of the road in her front yard, with her back to the road. When I left the house, she was kinda standing around the same area. When I came home, she ran out in front of the car and stopped in the middle of the road, cause she didn't want me to pass, but luckily, my driveway was before where she was standing. Then I watched for a few minutes and she did the same thing to the next few cars that drove by. That's pretty dangerous. Her dad looks like what my dad looked like in the 70's, with a big black mustache and super super skinny and those 70's style shorts that are pretty short and have white stripes on the sides.

I am making curtains today. i went to the fabric store the other day and now they have a Bargain Barn where everything is super cheap and all of the bolts of fabric on this one table are a dollar/meter, and so I got like 12 meters for 12 dollars and that's awesome, cause most of the other fabric i found was like $12 per meter. that's FUCKED.

L was a lady who peered through a shutter

so now i have real internet and a home so that's nice.... we're all moved in, kinda... i'm a bit of a slacker in the unpacking department. Although, I do work all day soooooooo I have an excuse. Also, I haven't been sleeping that good. I've been having super wierd dreams and then waking up at like 4AM and not going back to sleep. you know when you're awake but still half asleep and still dreaming kinda? that's what i do. it's awesome. i love it.
i don't really have anything to say. here's some lame pictures i took while super drunk.