Holy fast internet batman

I was talking to melissa about this the other day. I hate it when people think they have got you figured out and they say things like "oh, here's something you'll like, it's so YOU" and then it's some lame thing that you fucking hate. someone said to me once, "you'd really like this friend of mine. she likes all that girly music. you know, like sarah maclauchlin" FUCK OFF. ok i like maybe like two sarah maclauchlan songs, probably that she didn't even write. don't fucking think you can label me for some dumb reason like that i mentioned that i like one song. or when someone picks out a shirt and they say, oh this is soooo your style and it just happens to be the ungliest fucking shirt you've ever seen. it's insulting. i just hate when people think that they've got me 'figured out' or something.



here's another thing. when people that you either hardly know or hardly care about offer advice. sometimes, it's probably useful but whatever. there is a girl that i know that drives me fucking bananas who every time i mention any kind of issue that i'm thinking about, like going back to school, or running out of money, or whatever, she always pipes up with this deep fucking theory and heartfelt advice except it's totally not heartfelt cause she's a fucking bitch. Ugh I can't even describe her accuratly. it's like she thinks she has authority or something. like we should take her advice because SHE KNOWS.... and she gets angry if you don't take her advice. and she gets angry if you say something sarcastically. she'll take you seriously and say 'whatever JILL" and roll her eyes and not talk to you for a week, even though she fucking knew that whatever i said was a joke. she looks for reasons to get mad at people. god if she reads this, shes going to know that i'm talking about her and she's going to bad mouth me for the rest of my life. awesome. I said this on msn about her:
Red Jillicious says: (9:37:33 AM)
actually, surprisingly enough, she said very little. probably cause she knows that i'd tell you. all she said was that she hopes you don't get hurt and that she hopes that you don't fall for him too quickly and blah blah blah. things like that. cause you know, she's the book of knowledge and advice when it comes to relationships.

fuck i'm awesome. and whatever, you're probably all thinking what makes me better than her, why do i get to talk about her behind her back and bad mouth her? It's because i'm doing it in the name of niceness for the people she hurts and she's a bitch so whatever.




here's another thing I hate. when people are disrespectful to their parents. I mean, i know that there are situations where respect is not called for- like if your parents are abusive or something. But when you have had a wonderful childhood and your parents provided you with everything they were supposed to provide you with, and they love you, then don't fuking talk bad about them. I hate it when people expect their parents to buy them stuff and then get mad at them when they don't buy the nicest thing or don't buy them enough. i hate it when people say 'my parents bought cheese biscuits. me and my dad both LOVE cheese biscuits. I took the last two hahahahaha so when he goes to get one, they'll all be GONE!!!! HHAHAAHAHA!!!" seriously dude, that's not funny. that's bitchy. i feel so guilty for when i was a teenager (but i guess maybe it's just part of being a teenager) when mom did something that made me angry and i yelled at her or told her to shut up or told her to leave me alone. and i also feel guilty for the time that i didn't talk to my dad for a year. and i ddidn't even look at him on fathers day (when i was like 15). sorry mom and dad.

Here's the awesome thing I bought at Dominion Square. I couldn't believe my eyes. There was also a thing that looked like a speed limit sign that said "Don't stop for anything under 18." What??? do you need to put that up somewhere to REMIND yourself that you can't sleep with 18 year olds????




whatever. anyways. here's kind of a funny embarassing story. last weekend i guess it was... sometime when melissa was home. anyways, we were drinking, and then i came home. i was super hungry, but also REALLY tired, so i decided to make popcorn and bring it to bed with me. so i had all the lights off and i was shoving popcorn into my face and eventually fell asleep. this is embarassing. when i wok up in the morning i was face down on the bed- no pillow. there was a puddle of what i sleepily confused to be puke. it was just a little wet spot with this one peice of white, cottage-cheese like puke. I was soooo confused, because i was like woah, i didn't eat cottage cheese, and if i puked then why would i only puke such a tiny tiny amount?? and then, i looked on the floor and saw the half eaten bag of popcorn that I forgot i ate and realized that it was a little kernal of uneaten popcorn sitting in a little puddle of drool. oh my god. that's pretty awesome.